At the onset, I would like to mention that this post is an outcome of me wanting to speak out my mind in some form. Writing acts as channel to pen down my thoughts as I have been numbed after reading about a brutal act that happened in Delhi on a 23-year old girl. On one end I saw lawyers, cops, women activists, celebrities give their news bytes on the social and print media while on the other end the word on the street sought justice.
We have been relying on statistics, demographics and a whole bunch of other data for the longest time now but what we are failing to notice is the toxic mindset that is slowly creeping into the society. Yes, Delhi leads in gang rape numbers in India, does that automatically mean that women in other parts of India or anywhere else are safe? The answer is a big 'NO'. Having said that, it is a function of the society that we live in where looks, leering and groping feature into actions that are 'not serious'. To add to this, it really does not help when 90% of the rapes that happen are by the 'known' people. How does it feel when one's circle of trust is broken by the very trusted ones? How does it feel when the boundaries are crossed by infiltrators in the garb of trusted ones?
We have to understand that every state, especially the metros are undergoing a 'cosmopolitan' spin. Delhi, for instance, shares its borders with states where female foeticide and patriarchy levels are high whereas education levels are low. So when we are on the path to a culture that is more 'modern', we also have to be aware that this includes population which are 'ancient' in their mindset with respect to their attitude towards women.
Some men can't stand women speaking their mind, while some other men can't stand her being confident and successful. Taking it a bit further, some women also can't stand other women speaking their mind. So I am not trying to make it a gender issue. In this post, 'beauty' means the affected and the 'beast' means the person with a flawed soul, irrespective of gender. So when a sane woman has to find her way through this insanity, she is often told to keep quiet. It is time for us to realize that we have to hit back where it hurts the most. By that I mean, first and foremost we have to stand up for ourselves, learn some form of self-defense techniques and not let looks, words or touches that we are not comfortable with go under the 'chalta hai' attitude.
In a society, where for the most part, words like 'sex' and 'rape' cannot be uttered, there is a threat for even kids not being spared from such ghastly acts. So if you think adulthood is the barrier to be crossed, think again. In such a scenario it becomes imperative for us to teach our kids the difference between a 'good' touch and a 'bad' touch, a 'good' look and a 'bad' look and so on and so forth. Each of us has an intuition on these things and so do kids but they need to know they have the communication channel open with their parents to be able to share it with them.
The dynamics of society are changing so fast that the transition from 'this is someone we don't know' to 'this is someone we know' is happening rapidly. Hence lawmakers and security personnel need to understand the criticality of the issue and amend the laws of punishable offences, increase the conviction rates to a great extent. Only when the fear is instilled, will there be real beauty in driving away these beasts.
My sincere prayers with the girl who is battling for her life in Delhi.
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